This Week in Dracula Hunting

by: Daler Mendhi

 

            It was quite an eventful week for Dracula Hunting.  It is Dracula season, and Draculas can be found anywhere.  During this past week, I have shoved my wooden stake through eight Draculas. 

            On Monday, I was in the bathroom, washing my hands, singing Bolo Ta Ra Ra, when I looked up into the mirror and saw nothing behind me.  That is when I knew there had to be a Dracula behind me.  So I turned around really fast and jammed my stake into the heart of a Dracula.  I drank the Dracula’s invisibility potion and snuck into the Dracula hideout, which is located at Count Chocula’s Mansion.  I snuck in when I suddenly remembered that Draculas could smell fame, and who is more famous than Daler Mendhi, the pop king of India? 

            I quickly escaped, only to be attacked by a group of seven Draculas on hang gliders.  I pulled out the boom box I was carrying in my back pocket and turned on my latest hit, “Nach Baby Nach.”  All Draculas know all languages so the Draculas understood perfectly that I was telling the Draculas to “Dance Baby Dance.” 

            When you are told to do something by the Indian King of Rock and/or Roll, you do it.  So, the Draculas all started dancing, and I walked up to each Dracula and stabbed my stake through all the Draculas’ hearts.

            Dracula hunting is a fun and easy job.  You can try it although you will never be as good as me, Daler Mendhi.  All you need to do is find a Dracula in your life and hunt that Dracula.  Do you know any Draculas in your life?  Then, you know what must be done.  KILL ALL DRACULAS!!!